How can you have the relationship you want if your wants remain a secret?

“Men are four times more likely than women to negotiate the first offer, thus they accumulate an average of a half-million dollars more in their paychecks by age 60. Whether by nature or by nurture, many women shy away from negotiating salary. We assume that if we jump into the job, pull up our sleeves, and get down to business, someone will notice us and reward us accordingly. Rarely does that happen, and so you wind up cheating yourself out of money by not asking for it.”

Tory Johnson, CEO of Women For Hire and the official workplace contributor on ABC’s Good Morning America

If you’re wondering what this quote has to do with relationships, let me explain. If you want something specific from your partner–a kiss, a helping hand cleaning the kitchen, a night out with the guys, an impartial sounding board–ask for it.

Now, some of you reading this may think I’m stating the obvious, yet, like the quote by Tory Johnson illustrates, many of us assume our needs are evident even though we don’t take the time to make them clearly known. Yes, over time in a relationship–whether it’s long-term dating or marriage–we learn many of our partner’s non-verbal signals and we even know how to decode her/his secret language. However, unless your goals in life are to (a) make your partner work extra hard and (b) let your needs go unmet, it’s time to start speaking up for what you want.

Are you ready? Let us know how you’re going to advocate for your wants and needs. Or offer your own ideas about this suggestion.