Your wedding is your special day and should therefore fit your wants and needs. There is no “right” answer regarding the issue of choosing traditional or modern for your marriage ceremony. Below are suggestions for you to use in making choices that fit for you and your spouse-to-be.
How to decide on traditional or modern wedding choices
- First determine your overall vision for your wedding. Besides the obvious purpose of getting married, why else are you having your ceremony? What experience do you want to have? What kind of event do you want to create for your guests?
- Now consider if there are any traditions that are meaningful for you or important for you to include. Certain symbology, readings, or specific elements may help you create an event that “feels” like a wedding for you. These components may be serious–religious reading, cultural tradition–or more for fun–tossing the garter and bouquet, clinking glasses to make the newlyweds kiss.
- Check in with other key people (parents, your officiant, etc.). Even though it’s your wedding, it’s valuable to have conversations with those closest to you to learn of any wedding elements (traditional or modern) that they would like to see included/excluded. You may also be required to do certain things to have your marriage be official, so check with your officiant on this.
- Review your vision and your list of ideas to make your final choices. You may or may not have time to include every idea on your list, so determine which elements are essential and which can be eliminated or incorporated in some other part of your wedding events. You might make a 3-point scale and “rate” each of the ideas (must have, optional, can eliminate) as a quick way for you and your partner to make your final selection.
- Know that you’ve created the right wedding ceremony for you. Sometimes it’s easy to second guess yourselves or worry that you have to accommodate everyone’s wishes. Once you and your partner have made your choices, trust that these choices are the perfect ones for creating the magical wedding day that you’ve envisioned. Now have fun putting it all together into one joyous, honoring, and loving celebration!
How did you decide what wedding traditions to include and which to leave out of your big day? Share your wisdom with other couples preparing to say “I do.”