Just for fun I did an experiment in my local supermarket. I did some relaxation exercises and deep breathing to make sure I was in the best state for quietening my internal chatter before entering. Once inside I focused on being aware. Straight away I noticed sounds and colours to be more vivid. It was instinctive to start talking to myself (in my head) about what I’d noticed so I needed to quieten those thoughts. As I walked around people literally turned to look at me which is surprising as I’m usually very annonymous. Many of those people smiled genuinely at me even though I was not smiling myself and only rarely was I making direct eye contact with them. It was as though they could ‘feel’ my presence. After approximately ten minutes I decided to make a change and started chatting to myself internally about why I’d received such responses. However, at that moment all the responses ceased and I returned to the annonymity I was used to. I had once again blended in with all the other people lost in their own thoughts and internal chatter.

The essence of this experiment is that if complete strangers recognise and find themselves drawn to a ‘present’ person - how much better would they feel communicating with a loved one who was in a similar state?

This is well worth investigating yourself. Simply follow the advice in the original post and if you find yourself chattering internally (rather than listening and being present) just tell yourself to ’shhhhhhhh’. I’ve also found moving your eyes to look straight up makes it very difficult for internal chatter to continue. Just make sure you don’t walk into something or appear like you’re rolling your eyes!

Best wishes,

Adam.